


To Fall, To Soar

by thattrainssailed



Series: Words Hung Above, But Never Would Form [7]
Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: Canon Compliant, Greek myth - Freeform, Introspection, M/M, Metaphor, season one
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-05
Updated: 2018-11-05
Packaged: 2019-08-19 04:00:52
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 847
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16526909
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thattrainssailed/pseuds/thattrainssailed
Summary: If his siblings are Icarus, destined for the sea in pursuit of the sun, then he is Daedalus, the carer, observer of the youngers’ hubris. Unlike the Daedalus of the story, however, Alec has the benefit of hindsight. The plummet to death is preceded by leaving the tower. As long as they stay, as long as he keeps his siblings in line at the Institute, they will not fall.Alec is perfectly suited as the protector. He learns early on that the sun is not his to desire. His domain is in the shadows of the Institute, never pursuing, never craving, working with one eye on his family.Alec is not an Icarus.





	To Fall, To Soar

Alec is nine when he first hears the myth of Icarus. Even to his young mind, the story is not complicated: a young man fallen by his own hubris. His pursuit of the sun’s rays leave his father alone, gliding off into the horizon on his own invention while mourning its futility in the light of his son’s daring. It’s a simple lesson of feather and wax. Don’t fly too high, don’t pursue the sun, for below the sun is the icy maw of the waves, eager to devour the unlucky and the overconfident.

Alec never sees himself in Icarus. His siblings, yes - in fact, he is partially convinced that the story, written so long ago, was somehow intended precisely for Jace and Isabelle. The pair are reckless beyond belief. Sneaking out, training beyond their skill level, unsanctioned missions, indiscretions with downworlders. They constantly stand on the windowsill of their tower, arms outstretched, eyes ignoring the raging sea below in favour of gazing upwards towards blinding light. As they grow, inching ever closer to the ledge, Alec finds himself constantly keeping watch behind them, a finger hooked in their wax ligaments to keep them from falling. If his siblings are Icarus, destined for the sea in pursuit of the sun, then he is Daedalus, the carer, observer of the youngers’ hubris. Unlike the Daedalus of the story, however, Alec has the benefit of hindsight. The plummet to death is preceded by leaving the tower. As long as they stay, as long as he keeps his siblings in line at the Institute, they will not fall.

Alec is perfectly suited as the protector. He learns early on that the sun is not his to desire. His domain is in the shadows of the Institute, never pursuing, never craving, working with one eye on his family.

Alec is not an Icarus.

He meets Magnus Bane fourteen years after he first hears that myth of feather and wax, and he does not know what to make of him. Hubris would seem natural to the flashy warlock - hedonism is, after all, overestimation of one’s significance. And yet Magnus seems to only exude what is earned. His confidence has roots sunk into magical prowess and a flattering reputation amongst the downworld. He has wings, certainly, but they are made of something sturdier, something to withstand whatever sun he chases.

Alec refuses to think about the way Magnus’ face lit up when he caught the shadowhunter staring, or the gentle purr in the warlock’s voice whenever he was addressing Alec alone. Alec knows his place. He lives in silhouette. He never looks to the sun, and he certainly does not contain light. He throws himself into his work, into dealing with the Institute and Clary, cleaning up after his siblings once again. His finger stays hooked into their wax, and he ignores how welcoming the ledge has suddenly become.

The shadows of the tower commence a retreat.

By the time Alec and Magnus stand along on the loft’s balcony, cocktails in hand, Alec realises that the warmth kissing his skin is sunlight. Magnus smiles at him over his glass, eyes hooded, and Alec’s tongue turns to wax in his mouth, sliding futilely against words. Magnus’ fingers brush his hand, and it feels like feathers. When Alec returns to the Institute the next morning, he speaks to Izzy, and suddenly he realises that he is no longer behind her as she ponders over the ocean. She is safe within the tower, and it is Alec whose arms are dressed with flight.

Daedalus seems so far away.

Alec proposes to Lydia. A glance back into the tower. A silent will for the shadows to return. They do not.

Magnus speaks to him. The ocean crashes beneath them, and no matter how far Alec reaches out from the tower he cannot find the sun.

The ledge becomes an altar, and suddenly the sun is replaced by Magnus, glowing just as brightly at the end of the aisle, and before Alec can question himself he closes his eyes and falls forward, letting the wind catch his wings. The sea spray hits his face but then he soars upwards, gaining heights. The air rushing past him is nothing compared to the thrill of Magnus’ lips on his. Higher, ever higher. Warmth sighs against his skin. Magnus is burning hot and Alec waits for the first sting of wax against his flesh, for the feathers to fall away below him until he is chasing them against his own will, the cruel sea eager for its patience to reap reward.

The drop does not come.

When his eyes open, they are greeted with Magnus, standing before him in the doorway of the chapel, smile soft, gaze adoring as he watches Alec. The ocean disappears beneath Alec and suddenly there is only blue sky, blue sky and Magnus, freedom in all directions.

Alec thinks of Icarus. Of feather and wax. Of cruel sun and threatening ocean, of risk taken to escape that oppressive tower.

Magnus takes his hand.

Alec soars upwards.

 

**Author's Note:**

> Hoo boy, uni has kicked my ass this semester and left me no time for writing fic but I only have one essay to go. Hopefully then the #content will come more frequently.
> 
> More trash available on [tumblr](https://thattrainssailed.tumblr.com/).


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